What is it that makes us happy?

really…

this is the sort of question one asks when someone has encountered a road block to somewhat seem an endless happiness.
yeap. i'm not sure if i constructed that first sentence right, but i just wrote it and if you may, read that line again on Dr. Suresh' voice.  If you did not watch “Heroes” series then just forget about it.

ok. so what makes us happy?

we'll the answer ain't that really hard to find. i know for some people. Let's not look far and just look on what's infront of us at this time. Literally, our computers, well smartphones for some techies. Ok so let's open our favorite online hangout. which is? you guess it right. Facebook. just go over your newsfeed and there you can see endless posts which does at some extent signify happiness for some. There are exceptions though when some select few posts about rants and unluckiness, and unhappiness, and sadness and what have you. I understand them perfectly. Let's get back to the positive side, and let's look at the happy faces, the happy smiles. What do you see? You want to be in their shoes at that very moment. right?! Please tell me i am right? So there you go, I guess that's what happiness is or atleast that's what happiness is about. So let's have an example, actually let us have a lot of example and try to list them as guide to our quest for finding happiness.

Ok so someone post about eating a mouth watering food. Someone posts about her favorite shoes. Someone posts about their new house or new car. Someone posts about her favorite pet. Someones posts about him dating her pretty girlfriend and sometimes posting kissing her on her cheeks. Someone posts about excelling in his chosen sport. Someone posts about getting a high mark on an exam. Someone posts about achieving greatly in his career. Someone posts about listening to his favorite song. Someone posts about hanging out with his circle of friends. Someone posts about getting drunk. Someone posts about how lovable there pet is. Someone posts about getting together with his family. Someone posts about there newborn baby. Someone posts about their recently concluded vacation. Someone posts about landing his favorite surf trick. Someone posts about… well umm it's getting boring honestly but with the examples i pointed you have a clue about what happiness is and it should be clear by now right?

OK so do you have the same newsfeeds as i have?

maybe yes, or certainly yes. Yes i believe it's the latter.

So if happiness is just really around the corner and everything is given on how to achieve it and what to do to be happy then why do we sometimes feel sad and blue all of a sudden?

Maybe because life is not perfect? and we humans want it to be perfect when we know it's not. We try to achieve for our lives to be perfect and we continue to lie to ourselves that we can getaway with sorts of unhappiness. This probably is the answer. So for example you have weeks or maybe months of pure fun and enjoyment and laughter and joy and then one day boom! you are kicked right in the gut. You've suddenly become unlucky. maybe you caught a bad cold when you are scheduled for an outing which really is bad news since you won't enjoy it and you are torn whether to go and just live with your sickness or just stay and work on to be better. Maybe you got caught by a cop for a seemingly ultra minor traffic violation. Maybe you dropped your wallet somewhere containing all your IDs and it's nowhere to be found. Maybe your favorite pet died. Maybe you missed the last trip for  a bus bound somewhere. Maybe you failed to save your 5000 word blog post before the power got cut off. The Maybe's are endless but it is real for some and for me.

Well, i'm quite sure you are puzzled about why i am writing this? you might just have a clue. you are thinking that i have some problem, some big big problem that i want to let out. But honestly there's nothing. there's just me, the crazy me inside the “Me”.

Ok so i've got some strings of really2 good things happening in my life. For starters, I got married(that's a big leap from the immaturity that was me for a length of time) to a loving, understanding plus she being pretty and sexy(don't react). Then i got a real lovely and pretty daughter whose giving me tons of smile and happiness. Then i got a house, technically it's not yet mine as it's under mortgage and i need to pay it for the rest of my life. Then i got this pet ziggy, a labrador retriever which gives me alternative happiness. Then i got involve in this group, Couples for christ, which is a charismatic group which encourages couples to have Jesus as the center of the relationship. Then i gave my parents some business so they can have some extra income. So all in all my life ain't that bad as it seems.

So If there's no reason to be sad, then why i am asking this question? The answer is simple, i've got some episodes or burst of anger which i seem to direct to some people when things do not go as i want it to go. This is crazy i know and some kind of selfishness and i do not know why. I tend to be angry when things does not unravel as i want it to be. Am i a perfectionist? Or i just hate to HGH be hassled or this… I feel like i don't deserve the bad things ever! err. sounds like?? I know you'll be like “Who do you thing you are MARCO?!” Well you have the right in asking me that. I sometimes think of myself as so passive and will not do anything to deserve some unluckiness which is really crazy but I am not sure why I think this way. Maybe i so hate losing, I so hate to go anywhere but up, I hate to be in situations where i do not want to be.

This blog post is getting crazy, as this may seem to personal and I'm in a battle that i know i can not win

Sometimes i wished that i did not feel any of this happiness because i'm so afraid of it ending. I'm so afraid of losing them all.

When i was younger, I just envision myself to work on meager jobs like maybe driving a truck then earning like P200 a day. and live with my parents untile i'm 50 and not start any family. On my dayoffs or when i'm off duty i'll just be like skatingboarding all day and maybe get drunk after skating and smoke some weed and laugh myself to sleep. This setup was the perfect life for someone like me. But as it is true for everyone, Fate is as playful as it can get or on a deeper note, God gives you what you really deserve or God gives us what he thinks is what we can handle. God does not want to treat life with real ease to the extent that you'll do nothing to take good care of it Nor does he gives us something too difficult that we can't live with anymore.

So ending my blogpost. I wish i can answer the question i raised by understanding the things i wrote  above. I did not think of what to write in this blog post, honestly. This is like super spontaneous and yes there are a lot of grammar errors and spelling errors and i'm guilty. I just too tired to proof read it. Who cares, there's probably just me who's gonna read it anyway.

Now it's almost midnight. And i wish i can go to sleep with a lightheart after a real bad day today. Really I just want to write here that i've had a rough week. I had to go to the LTO to claim my drivers license after being flagged for not wearing a seatbelt while driving. I had to spend some 8k fixing the A/C of the vehicle im currently using only for it to turn out real bad, the A/C, no matter what we do, won't be able to make the vehicle cooler on a hot afternoon. and worst it affected the batteries! And the vehicle died in the middle of traffic with everyone behind me honking their horns at me like crazy! It's a terrible feeling. But here's how it's interesting. In my belief, and yes i believe this wholeheartedly, call me delusional if you must. In my belief, God had reasons for this. This is God's way of touching me and saying to me “Hey Marco, you are a terrible guy lately”. ok i have a trivia for you. My car died approaching the head point of a prayer rally! I know it's just the batteries dying because it's traffic and you have to clutch and brake and with the aircon and the blower but why do i have the feeling that God really stopped that car for a reason. Ok so this week, i've had a bunch of things I did that God won't be proud of. Firstly, i have this bible reading thing everyday, i setup a program to email me daily bible verses, and it's not one or two verses. it's like an entire chapter. So i kind of grew tired and read the bible verses passively and uninterestedly sometimes not understanding a single word! Sorry God ;( Please help me improve my comprehension and please up my interests in reading them. Second is, i kind of lax in my Job. It's like i'm not giving it all I got, sometimes i take breaks just to watch NBA or play PS3 when i know i still have some tasks to take care to. God won't be proud of that I know. Thirdly is, sometimes i tend to want to watch tv series on my PC rather than gramt my wife's request of tending to my baby for a minute while she takes care of something. God won't be proud of that either. So summing all of these things, i can say that I deserve all the unluckiness i've had had this past few days. It is just God's fatherly tap and he wants to remind me that there are somethings he is not so proud of.

Now with this, can I answer now the question “What is it that makes us happy?”

Easy. Accept the negative things that's happening in your life as having a purpose for your life to improve, if not here on earth then God knows where it will be. But whatever it is just believe that God has a plan for you. Turn that negative into something positive. Instead of me complaining why are these things happening to me or that I don't deserve any of them, there's me accepting the fact that my understanding is so primitive compared to God's Plan.

Live your life on God's path and for sure your happiness will be everlasting!

God bless you my friend and if you are by a twist of fate stumbled and read this blog post, it only means God has a reason why he made you read this.

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